I really like you. I know you say you are too young to like boys but when it comes to love, it overcomes everything. I know you think I am annoying and a fool, but I am a fool for you. Since I fall a lot, do you have a Band-Aid? If you don’t it’s alright, I just scrape my knee falling for you. When I see you, it’s like an earthquake or did you rock my world? When you sneeze I would say God bless you, but it looks like he did already. You are so hot even the leaves fall for you. You’re so cute puppies look at you on the internet. You are really nice. When I am sad, you make me happy. I don’t know what I would do without you. You are probably going to say no, but will you go couple skating with me? We don’t have to hold hands. Well now you know how I feel.
This is a real love letter from a 10 year old boy to the daughter of a friend of mine. First of all this kid is either going to be a killer with the ladies or he is going to be one devoted man to one special lady. I would love to say the game is strong but I truly believe that he sincerely meant every single word in this letter. He needs to start writing poems, songs, or greeting cards because his hyperbole game is off the charts. When I first read this letter I thought it was the best love letter ever written. The kid said “When you sneeze I would say God bless you, but it looks like he did already.” It doesn’t get much better than that. I shared this letter with everyone I knew. It was just so hilarious and heartfelt! Only recently did it hit me that I don’t know too many men that would ever put themselves out there like this. Personally never would I ever do anything like this. My thinking was I’m way too cool and tough for some shit like this. But to be honest, the one who expresses his true feelings is actually the brave one.
We have all been there! You met a woman who opened your eyes to a whole new world. Everything about her grabbed your attention. From her walk, to her laugh, to how her eyes opened just a little wider when she was truly interested in your take on a particular subject. For once you paid attention to everything about a woman. You’re fuckin hooked! The woman could damn near get y’all in a car accident, but you’re just thinking how cute it is that her ass can’t drive for shit (and that you’ll be doing majority of the driving here on out). You want to share all these feelings with her. You want to give her all these details because you want to see her face light up with excitement and possibility, BUT YOU’RE FUCKING SCARED!
What if she doesn’t respond the way you hope she does? What if you find out this woman who is making this great impression on you just sees you as another guy? Yo that will fuckin suck monkey balls! It is going to break you down. You’re gonna be sick! This whole time you could have just played it safe and acted like you didn’t give a fuck. You probably still would have at least got some pussy out of it. Hey, that’s what your cool ass has been doing all these years. Why would you change up now?? You change up now because you want a different feeling. You want a different type of satisfaction. You want to be super excited to be doing absolutely nothing with this woman. Her presence is it. The thought of seeing her later that evening is allowing you to walk through the battlefield at work unscathed. Yo take the chance. Show some bravery. It won’t be the end of the world if it doesn’t turn out the way you want. It’s gon hurt like a muthafucka but you’ll be straight. Think about the possibilities if it turns out exactly how you want. Now wouldn’t that be fucking amazing!
First I want to apologize for the long hiatus. By the look of things my wisdom has been needed. I see so many of y’all making stupid ass dating mistakes. You could have just gone to my archives to get a lesson or two. Get it together people! Well I’m back and I promise to be more consistent. You’re welcome.
I am not gonna lie to you folks, I don’t think I have ever been in love. I have loved in a caring type of way but never the romantic love. And I am still not even sure what that is. Most of you don’t know what it is either (infatuated fuckers). Anyway, a few of my ex girlfriends (actually 2) have meant a lot to me. This means I actually give a fuck about their lives. Like if they are stuck somewhere in my convenient radius then I will come scoop em up with no problem. I’ll even accept their collect calls if they get locked up (hopefully someone smuggles them a cell phone so we can text because I hate talking on the phone). But most importantly I would never play with their emotions. So having sex with them is not an option for me. While I can just view the sex as only an orgasm, they may look deeper into it and see potentially rekindling a relationship. Even if she says she only wants sex, DO NOT DO IT! Unless you think the sex is worth losing someone you care about or them hating your guts, PLEASE let them go.
Maturity comes with experience. I sound like I have it all figured out now but years ago it was all about the poon. I didn’t give a damn about anyone’s feelings, I wanted them cakes! I have definitely told a woman I loved her to get some ass. I am NOT proud of this at all. That one I actually truly regret. The woman forgave me people so please stop your judging IMMEDIATELY. Another regret was using an ex that meant so much to me for sex. We had been broken up for a couple months and I had no intention of giving up my newly acquired freedom anytime soon. BUT I still wanted that ass. I knew she still loved me and I used that. I took advantage of her. One day she finally realized my only objective was my own selfish satisfaction and I became dirt to her. She could not understand how a man that once meant everything to her could completely disregard her feelings and emotions for a fucking nut. She was hurt, disappointed, and hated me. I felt like shit. It took a few years but we eventually became good friends again. I’ve made sure I never did that to another woman that I truly cared about.
It is not easy. We are men and we are driven by the vag. I had a buddy that was dating this young lady for a while. She wanted a relationship while he was fine with just sex and occasionally hanging out. The problem was they were friends and he really did care about her. My boy just wasn’t ready for commitment at the time. He was not willing to give her what she wanted so he needed to shut it down and stop wasting her time. He had a hard time doing this. He was comfortable with her, the sex was great, and like I said, he really did like her. Now he did tell her he wasn’t ready for a committed relationship, BUT he knew she had a weakness for him. She was in a stage of hope. While in that stage he could throw a rock at her and she’ll get excited. She is looking for any sign to hold on to that hope. I told him if he cared about her he must let her go, completely. He eventually let her go but there was a lot of damage done.
So basically don’t be a selfish asshole to people that you love. Go masturbate or get you a fuck buddy (check out ‘fuck buddy rules’ in the archives). That orgasm is not worth hurting someone you care about, believe me. If she is constantly throwing it at you, this is not the time to get your Jerry Rice on. Fellas, think Neo in the Matrix and dodge all that. Loyal and dependable individuals are hard to come by, so cherish them. On another note, I’m back in this thang heaux! So leave comments and share. If you have topics you want me to touch on leave those in the comments as well.