Tag Archives: Lifeguard Tower

Do it anywhere!

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Your relationship is stale. You are having sex once every couple of weeks.  When you do have sex it’s like a chore.  Routines fucking SUCK so get out of them. You guys need to try something new. You need a really good kickstart.  I don’t mean some regular punk ass date night. No wack ass dinner and a movie.  Plan a date of public fucking! No picnic unless you’re gonna do it right there in the park. No long walk on the beach unless you’re gonna end up with sand particles on your genitals (sex on the beach is dope but sand in your ass crack sucks). 

This is the spark you need. It is time to get adventurous and spontaneous. It will start as a plan but next thing you know you will be pouncing everywhere.  I have done this before and it is definitely in my top 5 dates.  This is the plan, you guys have to agree on about 5 places to try to get it on.  Of course you don’t want to get caught but the fact that you might makes it even better.  If you’re a little nervous about trying this then start with places you are less likely to get caught.  Even though you probably won’t get caught, you still know someone could possibly be watching or at least be taking notice that you were being naughty.  Some safer places are the beach really late at night or those lookouts that you’ve seen on all the high school movies where kids are trying to get their freak on.

For those who want to step it up lets do this!  This means you can’t give a fuck.  Pick a place and do it. We are breaking laws here folks and we just don’t give a damn.  Elevator- SMASHIN. Stairwell- SMASHIN. Drive thru- SMASHIN.  Ok so we decided to get a bite to eat.  OOPS your napkin fell under table.  Babygirl I think you need to pick that up…HEADY TIME!  Be open, be free, and have some fun.  Your partner is going to look extremely sexy to you after this date night, I promise. 

Here is a list of some other public options that you might wanna try out:

Baseball Diamond: I’m trying to dig her out in the dugout!

Movies: Of course! This where you were trying to get it on when you were still living with your parents. Be a kid again!

Random Restrooms: I’m talking hotels, restaurants, etc. Yeah the thought is a bit unsanitary but it’s still a good time.

College Library: Definitely not gonna work during finals week.

Tennis Court: Bend her ass over the net!

Department Store Dressing Rooms: Babe, how do these pants look on me?? WHAM! In there.  One of the easiest spots.

College Classroom: There is always an empty college classroom with an open door. You can earn that grade in there!

Cemetary: Creepy as fuck but I’m down.

Rooftops: Pick one! I know a couple I need to try out. Think about that view while you are pounding cakes.

Drive In: I really hope you’ve done this before but if you haven’t you’re welcome.

Forest: I live in LA so there aren’t too many of these but if you live near one go ahead and knock that out.

Parking Garage: If it’s the top floor then bend her over the hood.

Parks: On the swing, slide, monkey bars, etc. Make sure you don’t bring your kids to that same park!

Lifeguard Tower: They’ve been locking them lately, sad face.

Airplane: MILE HIGH CLUB BABY!!!!

Bleachers: Bring some cushions!

If you have more spots, leave them in my comments.   

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